Introduction
Dear Birthmother,
We would like to start this letter by saying that we admire your decision to consider placing your child with an adoptive family. For us, it is one of the most selfless and loving decisions a person can ever make. Please rest assured that if you choose us as the adoptive parents of your child, we would help him or her to grow up to feel confident and loved. We would give your child all the opportunities to explore their interests and claim their dreams. We will never take the gift of the opportunity to love and raise your child for granted. We will always feel gratitude to you and raise your child to know of your noble and loving decision. Thank you for taking the time to read about us and about why we would love to be parents.
Our Thoughts on Adoption
After five years of trying to conceive a child (which included five IVF cycles for infertility), we were grateful to have the opportunity to become parents through adoption. Even before we had completed the last two cycles, we attended an adoption conference to gain more information about the adoption process. Parenting is an experience we both deeply desire. Both of us long to hold a baby in our arms, walk hand in hand with a toddler and listen intently as a child describes his or her school day. Regardless of how a child comes into our lives, we feel that things happen for a reason. We have hope that, one way or another, the child we were meant to love and raise will, through grace,
patience and courage on everyone’s part, be a joyous part of our lives. We have taken time to learn about adoption and speak with close friends; some are adopted and some are adoptive parents. One of our close friends was adopted as an infant and has told us about
the gratitude he feels towards both his birth and adoptive parents. This friend understands the circumstances that led to his adoption and he has nothing but respect and love for his birthmother.
One of our neighbors adopted their second son through Full Circle and shared their experience with us. We were really impressed by the way they spoke of the experience and the openness they have with their son and his birthmother. All these experiences have contributed to our comfort in building our family through adoption. We are pleased that the child we are blessed to adopt will know others in our friendship circle and neighborhood who have had loving adoption experiences.
Joanne:
Joanne: We met one night at a social event. My best friend growing up was with me at the time and she knew that I found Rob attractive. She bet me that I wouldn’t go up and speak to him. Well, she lost that bet and the rest is history. From that night forward, we were a couple. We dated for four years. In a touching and dear gesture, Rob asked my father for permission to marry me. My father knew how happy I was and gave his blessing; we got engaged and were married one year later. We both knew that we were meant to be together, not only because of a mutual attraction and love for one another, but also because we both value the love of family, have a strong sense of faith, and value showing respect for others. We want to share these values and our love for one another with a child.
When a child joins our family, he or she will have the best of all worlds. Rob works from home as a regional sales manager for a medical device company. He has quite a bit of flexibility with his schedule to be very involved in our child’s day-to-day life. I (Joanne), have a very large and involved extended family. My parents are eager to spend special grandparents’ time with our child during the week along with the care he or she will be provided with through a day-care center in our town. I’ve taken some time off from my work in the financial services industry to focus on building our family. I will be returning to work soon, but with a very family-friendly company that is only fifteen minutes
from our home. Because we will have much flexibility in our work schedules, we will be very active in the day-to-day care of our child.
Joanne: Rob is my best friend and has been the source of compassion and encouragement as long as I’ve known him. He can be sensitive when called for and is not afraid to show his emotions. He has been there for his family and as well as my family whenever someone has asked for assistance. He has always been able to make me laugh like no one else ever has. I consider myself to have a very good sense of humor. Because we each share this common trait, we have been able stay positive in our journey to parenthood even though we’ve been faced with several obstacles over the past five years. It’s ironic that an experience such as infertility can either strengthen a relationship or destroy
it. In our case we were blessed because our relationship was strengthened so much. I also love the fact that on our drives to Maine, we find ourselves singing together in the car. One of our favorite cd’s is ABBA Gold, which is full of great songs.
We both have been so fortunate in other aspects of our lives that we have wanted for so long to share our good fortune with a child. I know that Rob will be such a great father because he has so much to share with a child. He loves to fish and enjoys boating on the ocean. I have to say that he’s a much better gardener than I am. While growing up in Connecticut, he was very active in music and drama. He played piano, guitar, the French horn and was also active in chorus and drama. Just as he enjoyed as a child, in the summertime, we spend quite a few weekends at Rob’s mother’s cottage in Maine. A few years ago, Rob and I had a pier and float installed in front of the cottage. It has provided hours of enjoyment just to be able to sit and relax on the water. Even though the water in Maine is cold, on very hot days, we swim in the bay. We’re also able to jump in our motorboat, which is a great way to fish and explore the beautiful coast of Maine.
I grew up as the eighth youngest of nine children (two girls and seven boys). My mother was a stayat- home mom while my father was a police officer in our town. I grew up just outside Boston and loved traveling into the city on the “T” which is what the public transportation is nicknamed in Boston. Growing up close to the city and in the town that I did, gave me exposure to quite a diverse population. My parents gave my siblings and I the love and support we needed, let us spread our wings, make our own mistakes, and learn from those experiences. They encouraged each of us to attend college or expand our knowledge in a trade to help further our professional growth. I believe that it is because this love and support that we were able to adjust to our college, professional, and adult lives with confidence. My parents still live in the house where I grew up and are only 35 minutes from Rob and me. In fact, my siblings and I are all within 35 minutes of one another which makes it easy to get together for family functions. With 14 grandchildren ranging from ages 7 ½ months to 26 years old, there is always some function or get-together that we attend. My family is extremely excited about our adoption plan. We have a waiting list of baby-sitters available including my parents who are thrilled to play a regular and active role with their new grandchild. Because both our families are within driving distance to us, we are able to attend special events for each other. Rob and I host an annual Holiday Open House that our families, friends, and neighbors attend. It’s an opportunity for those close to us to take a moment and relax with one another. Because there are so many children involved, it’s also a great opportunity for everyone to see how quickly they’re growing up. We love it because it gives us a chance to give back something to those we love.
Rob:
Rob: My best friend is Joanne. She is compassionate, caring and she is always there to congratulate me in my successes and failures. I’ve always loved buying roses for Joanne. I would bring home roses on special occasions like Valentines Day, our anniversaries and sometimes, just to say “I love you”. The last time I brought her a dozen was about 2 years ago when we had our first “positive pregnancy” as a result of IVF. Unfortunately, that didn’t turn out well and it’s been some time since I’ve brought her roses again. I’m looking forward to the day that we can bring both a wonderful child and new roses home at the same time.
The holidays are such a big deal for both of us. At Christmas for example, I will make a big production of putting out the lighted reindeer on the front lawn, stringing lights outside of the bushes and making the outside of our home as festive as possible. After a long Saturday of working out in the cold getting the outside ready, I am always amazed to come back inside the house. Joanne will spend a whole day decorating every nook and cranny with every beautiful decoration imaginable. Every year we host an open house for our family and friends and most are at aw with the decorating that Joanne does. It’s very special. Our beloved dog Murray is especially excited because he knows
he has been a good boy all year especially when he sees his stocking hung by the fireplace next to Joanne’s and mine. Every year we have said the same thing to each other when opening our stockings on Christmas morning- we will truly feel whole and blessed as a family when we can experience the joy of a child’s smile going through their Stocking on Christmas morning.
I can’t wait to be a Dad. Joanne and I live in a comfortable house across from the local elementary school. I work as a Regional Sales Manager for a medical device company and while I travel on occasion, I work primarily out of my home office. We have many children in our neighborhood and in the mornings I can see the Dads walking their kids to school. I often stop what I’m doing just to imagine the day that I too can walk my kids to that elementary school across the street. In the evenings, I’ll take Murray for walks and sometimes, we’ll end up watching a little league baseball game. We’ll both sit and just watch the kids play ball- I think about the day that I too will be able to
watch and participate in my son’s or daughters’ activities and be an active parent. I was blessed with a great up bringing from my parents, as was Joanne, so we will both instill the virtues of leadership, trust, honesty, caring for others and success in our child.
I grew up in Connecticut and had a wonderful childhood experience. My mom was a special needs teacher and later a 4th grade teacher up until her retirement. She spends much of her time as a volunteer to many local causes and is a loving Grandma to my nieces. My dad was active in the Air force Reserves and spent his career with IBM. My sister is married with two children we adore, Christina (6) and Phoebe (3) Growing up I can remember many fond memories that I will always share with my future son or daughter. Some examples include my love of music, acting, sports, loyalty to others and trying my best to get others to laugh. In the summer we spend time at my Moms cottage in Maine and just this summer, I taught my niece Christina how to fish, swim and even row a boat!
In terms of parenting, we want to be able to share all that has been given to us and to share what is important to the child. Our interests are something that we hope the child will participate in, but we also want to give them the opportunity to explore their own interests. We will be there for school and social events. If he or she participates in sports, we’ll be there to cheer them on. We’ll be there to teach them right from wrong. Participation in church and faith in god is important to us. This will be a part of our child’s life as well. It’s also extremely important that as parents we need to lead by example. If we express our love and respect for each other in front of the child not only through words but also through actions, the child will know he or she is secure and is loved.
Our Hobbies
Travel is something that we both enjoy. In addition to Maine, we love to take trips elsewhere in our country and abroad. We took a trip to Ireland along with 15 other family members to attend a cousin’s wedding. What a trip! It is one of the best memories we share. Recently as part of an award Rob won through his company, we took a trip to Spain and London. Because of Joanne’s previous trips to London, she was able to show Rob around the city. It was really special. But we were keenly aware of how much more fun this travel would be if we were joined by a son or daughter. We look forward to those days.
Our Home
Our home is situated in a lovely suburb. We have three bedrooms and backyard that is just perfect for a swing set. Our neighbors are great people and there are plenty of children around to play with and eventually, act as babysitters. There are horse stables close by and our dog always loves to pretend he is the same size as the horses whenever we walk by them. Academically, our school system is very good and it also has excellent music and sports programs. In addition to being 25 miles from Boston, we are also close to city of Providence, RI and the beaches of Massachusetts and Rhode Island.
Our Dog
One very important part of our family is our dog, Murray. Murray is an eight-year old collie/lab/shepherd mix. Murray became a part of our family when he was seven months old and he immediately became an integral part of our family. Although he gets excited when he sees anyone he knows, he showers them with kisses and is gentle around babies and small children. He’s been around our nieces and nephews and they all adore him.
In Conclusion…
Again, we would like to thank you for taking time to learn more about us. Your decision cannot be an easy one but the fact that you have considered adoption tells us that you are a generous person. If you want, we are more than happy to communicate with you over the years and give you information and reassurance that your child is happy and doing wonderfully. Photo and letter updates will be provided to the agency or to you directly; you can ask for them whenever you want. We also hope to have an opportunity to learn more about you so that we can, in turn, share positive, loving and reassuring information to your child. We hope to have the opportunity to talk with you if you’d like and to meet, if you’d like. Please let us know. Thank you so much for considering us as possible parents to your child.
If you would like to learn more about us or speak to us directly, please call Full Circle at 1-888-452-
3678.
Our warmest wishes,