Introduction

Dear Birthmother,

We are very grateful to you for considering us as possible parents for your child. It is our hope that reading this letter will bring you comfort as you consider adoption. We imagine that this must be a very difficult time for you, and you are certainly in our thoughts and prayers.  After several years of fertility treatments, we were blessed in 1997 with our son, Peter, who is a happy, outgoing child.  It was always our dream to have a larger family, but we are unable to give birth to another child.  We are eager to share our open hearts, our love of fun, and unconditional love with another child.

We are especially comfortable with adoption because Michelle was adopted as an infant.  We also have several friends who either were adopted themselves or have adopted children. During college, Michelle’s doctor advised that she would have difficulty becoming pregnant later in life. We do not see adoption as a second choice – but as a second chance to have the larger family we have always dreamed of.

Our family will love your child unconditionally.  We feel that each one of us is special and possesses our own gifts, talents and character.  As parents, we strive to do our best to nurture these talents and gifts, encouraging and guiding our children, showing them that they can and will make a difference in this world.

About Us

We met at a party given by one of Michelle’s childhood friends.   That night we established a connection like neither of us had ever known.   On our first date, we met in Boston and spent the entire night talking about our lives, our hopes and dreams – and we were amazed to find out how much we shared.  Ten months later, we were engaged – and then celebrated our marriage surrounded by family and friends a year later.

Our Families

Our families are also excited about welcoming a new child into the family.  We live very close to Tim’s family, as they all live within 25 minutes of us.  Many members of his very large extended family (aunts, uncles, cousins and their children) also live in nearby towns.  We have several nieces and nephews on his side – his brother Craig and sister-in-law Kim have 3 children (Kaitlyn, Ryan and Brittney).  Tim’s sister Lynn has two children – Brenden and and Shantelle.  We were honored when Lynn asked us to be Brenden’s godparents.  Peter, who is looking forward to being a big brother, has been getting all the practice that he can, holding, feeding and singing to Brenden.

We often get together with Tim’s family on the spur of the moment – as well as for the celebration of birthdays and holidays.  Michelle’s family is a bit more spread out – with her sister Sherri and brother-in-law Stephen living in Virginia – and her brother Greg, sister-in-law Nancy and 3 nephews (Trinity, Michael, and Christopher) living in the Adirondack mountains.    Her dad passed away recently after a long struggle with diabetes – and her mom is planning to spend winter in Florida & the rest of the year at the family vacation home in Maine.   While we can’t visit on spur of the moment with them, we often celebrate birthdays and holidays together with Michelle’s family.   The home in Maine is on a lake and in the middle of the mountains, and we visit often in both summer and winter.

Our Home

We live in a beautiful 4 bedroom home in a small New England town – in a neighborhood filled with children ranging in age from 6 months old and up.  When we moved here last summer, within the first hour after our arrival, children were ringing the doorbell, ready to meet the new kid moving in.  Within the first couple of hours, we had met all of our neighbors.  We have had a great experience with the school system as well as all of the activities that we’ve become involved in with Peter.  While the town we live in is small, we are only 30-40 minutes from the large cities of Boston and Providence, but only 20 minutes from the charm and warmth of Cape Cod and the ocean.  We love exploring new places and have had many fun days visiting parks, museums, aquariums, zoos and beaches.

Our Hobbies

We have traveled all over the United States, taking at least one family vacation every year.  One of our favorites was a trip to California with Tim’s parents, where we rented a home on the Pacific Ocean.  Our stay there included visits to Legoland, the San Diego Zoo, Sea World and, of course, Disney Land.   Another family favorite was a trip to Florida where we rented a house in Kissimmee and enjoyed all the Disney World parks, Sea World and visits with Michelle’s family.

We love spending time outdoors.  In the nice weather we enjoy playing outside in our large backyard, fishing in the river that runs behind our home, swimming in Tim’s parent’s pool, taking an afternoon ride on their boat, hiking up one of the local hills, and going to the beach.  In the winter, we love sledding, skating, skiing and snowboarding (which Peter talked Michelle into trying last year).

We have a 5-year old golden retriever, Casey, who often accompanies us on these outings.  Casey is a gentle, lovable, and playful dog.  He’s even made friends with the boxer and sheltie next door – who come over & wait on our back deck for Casey and Peter to come out and play.

We also enjoy sports. Growing up, Tim played hockey, basketball, football and swam on the swim team.  Michelle ran track and played field hockey, basketball and softball.  Now, we enjoy cheering on Peter and his teammates playing baseball in the spring and soccer in the fall.  Each of us has had a chance to coach one of Peter’s teams (Tim coached t-ball and Michelle coached basketball).  We’ve encouraged Peter to pursue interests of his own, like archery, which he developed a love for at summer camp.  We all love cheering on the New England sports teams – especially the Boston Red Sox and the New England Patriots.

Music is another love shared by us all.  Tim grew up playing the guitar, Michelle the piano and the guitar.  We love to sing every chance we get – whether it’s singing with the radio in the car – or with the Karaoke machine that Santa brought for Christmas.   We have a piano and the bench is always open to any child who wanted to play it.  Anyone is welcome to sit down and play – Michelle’s love of the piano grew by being able to do just that in her aunt’s home when she was little.  Peter has a guitar, an accordion, a harmonica and an electronic drum set that he loves to play, not to mention the clarinet we currently keep hidden from him.

Our Careers

We both attended college, working our own way through.  We are looking forward to being able to provide more support for our children’s education.  We want every door possible to be open to them, and we have started making plans and have set aside funds even now for this purpose.

Tim has worked for a national food distributor for the past 17 years (part-time during college).  He’s worked his way up through the ranks and now enjoys a flexible job as an account executive, working from home when he’s not visiting local clients.  Michelle currently works as a project manager for a high-tech electronics company, where she has worked for over 8 years.  While she loves the challenges of her job and enjoys co-workers who are like “family,” she is looking forward to spending time at home with a new child on an extended leave of absence.  She plans to return to work part-time from home at some later point.

Our Son

Our son Peter is a loving, sensitive, bright, energetic child.  On the playground, he’s the one that defends the little girl in kindergarten getting picked on by the third grader and tries to cheer up the upset little boy who scraped his knee coming off the slide.  He is also a persuasive little guy and has the ability to talk you into just about anything.   This is where we’ve found the most challenges in parenting – when you want to give your child everything that they dream of – but realize that is not always what’s best for them.

Michelle:

I was raised in a loving home along with a younger brother and sister that were biological children of my mom’s.  I always knew that I was adopted, and my mom often told me how much I was loved by both my adoptive family and birth family.  As part of our family, your child will always know of your love.  I’ve always had a strong relationship with my brother and sister, and I think that we are even closer than many kids that are “birth siblings.”  Growing up, we rarely fought but instead joked, supported, and comforted each other.

Four years ago, I reconnected with my birth mom, Lu.  This has been the beginning of a beautiful relationship with a new family to love and be part of.  I understand the beautiful gift of life that my birth mother gave me (as well as her eyes, smile, and laugh) just as you are giving to your child.   Since then, we call each other often and visit every year (she and her family live in Florida).  I cherish the time that we have spent getting to know each other, as well as her husband, John, and my brother Matt and sister Katie.  We are truly blessed to have so many people that love and care about us.  I understand that you may or may not want connection over the years.  Based on my personal experience, however, please know we are open to communication with you over the years.

There were so many things that I loved about Tim from the beginning.  He made me laugh.  He was smart, funny, and caring.  I loved how important his family was to him.  I remember one of the things that he told me on our first date was that his family would always come first – before work or anything else. That struck a chord with me because I felt the same way.  His mom had become very ill with a brain tumor a few years before I met him.  The way that I saw both her strength and his family’s love and loyalty as they stood by her, supporting and adoring her through and after her recovery, made me love him even more.

From the moment that I saw Tim to the day I married him to last night’s good night kiss, I couldn’t imagine what life would be like without him.  Not to say that we haven’t had our problems; but, we’ve found our way through every one of them with love, faith, strength, humor, and loyalty.  He is the love of my life and my best friend.

As parents, Tim and I balance each other out well.  As a dad, Tim is amazing.  It never ceases to amaze me how he knows just the right things to do and say at just the right times.  He knows when to be serious, when to be playful and fun, when to comfort, cheer on, and inspire.  He’s like this with every child that I’ve ever seen him with.

Tim:

To me, parenting requires a lot of inspiration and a good sense of humor.  I like to laugh.  I love to make others laugh, which is probably why my wife fell in love with me.  My family embodies inspiration.  They inspire me, and it is my charge to inspire them.  My earliest inspiration was my Dad.  When I was very young, he worked 3 jobs and operated a tank for the US Army.  When I was eighteen, my mother battled a brain tumor and survived because she wanted to and because we willed her to.  My wife, Michelle, looks for and finds the good in every person and situation.  She inspires me with her ever-present smile and cool loving attitude. My son inspires me the most in the mornings when I see him jump out of bed ready to learn and to teach.  I watch the delicate way he interacts with others and the way he can ignore those that don’t see the world as an equal place for all.  Just watching him sleep, play and breathe is a constant inspiration.  I grew up in a loving home and do my best to make my son’s childhood the same way.

I feel that Michelle is everything any child could want in a mother.  She isn’t just Peter’s friend; she is Peter’s mom.  She is patient, nurturing, and understanding.  Michelle’s kind and optimistic way is the perfect example for a child, and Michelle does lead well by example.  For me, the love I feel for Peter is unlike any I’ve ever felt.  I love being a father, and I try to improve as a parent everyday.

With Peter, I am constantly amazed – and that is a wonderful way to travel through life.  Just watching him grow has been the biggest gift I could ever have.  When he stood in front of me this morning, I put my hand on his head, showing both him and Michelle that he is nearly up to my neck.  He just keeps growing.  Growing as a young man – learning, teaching, exploring, and experimenting.  He has his mother’s passion, and it shows everyday in his actions.  He shares the things in life that he loves the most, and that is unusual.  He too is ready to share his love with a sister or brother.  He will be a terrific big brother, with lots of laughs and love to share.

For our part, Michelle and I can share values and experiences, but we try to let Peter make his own decisions.

Parenting has been everything I dreamed of and more.  Sure, it has its challenges; but, for me, the rewards far out-weigh anything else.  I have always loved being around children, and they seem to like the human jungle gym I often become.  I have always dreamed of having a big family, and am ready to welcome another child into our lives, with the same love and open arms that we share with each member of our family.

If you choose as parents for your child, he or she will grow up knowing of your love and of your selfless and courageous decision.  You can move through the rest of your life with regular updates and photographs of your child, if you wish, or other contact if you’d like. We would welcome a chance to meet you, if you’d like this. It’s very important to us that you’re able to go forward in your life, confident of your decision, affirmed in your brave and compassionate act and certain of your child’s happiness and well-being.

Please know that we can make ourselves available at any time to speak with you on the phone.  We would be happy to hear from you.  Please contact Marla Allisan at Full Circle Adoptions, toll free: (1)-888-45-ADOPT.

Sincerely,

Michelle and Tim